Gray Matters

Sorry I haven’t posted in some time, I got the job I was waiting for!  So I have been getting acquainted with my new position and it is a day full.  That’s why they call it full-time!

I am now the Peer Support Specialist at Access to Independence in San Diego.  I am primarily working with people who have sustained brain and spinal chord injuries.

I am starting a mentoring program which is cross-disability.  So I match people up that have the same or similar disabilities; one has been down the road with the disability with someone who has more newly acquired the injury or disability.  Mentors use their disabling experience to help guide another person who is walking a similar path.

I am waiting
ON DISABILITY TIME,
to hear
if I get
a position
Access to Independence
Peer Support Specialist.
I feel as if I am floating in the air,
wanting,
but not knowing.
Helping others to their lilipads
after traumatic injuries
I am grounded
in self-confidence
Want to put my skills into action
If not,
maybe
I’ll become a professional surfer
dancer!
I dance
to save myself
from boredom!
Synchronicity of mission,
care for others
and personal healing.
Emotional well-being,
Support
Do the clients service,
I get mitzvot
under my belt
in helping others…
It’s all good!

My regards to all of you.  I am sorry, I have been so involved with myself, that I haven’t given time to communicating.  I am persuing work in the field of  helping people with disabilities access independence.

For me, my functionality is best accessed if I see to it that I am feeling good.  So, for example, I Swing dance and if I see to it that that aspect of myself is taken care of, I am that much more able to do what I need to do in the world (i.e. care for others).  Doesn’t that make sense?

I am looking to take my services to a higher level than before (that will take more focus).  I am not saying that I need to swamp myself with pleasures, so that I can help others… It does take a balance of caring some for yourself, though.  I am going through a churning wheel of self-worth.  It is not to be distinguished by outcome, but my own internal judge.  Lord help me to not get excessively critical or lavish.

I am trying to unfreeze my telephone line to the outside world.  I don’t like to just babble.  THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE DOING THAT ALREADY!!!  The world would be a more peaceful place if so many would just shut up!  I want to feel that I atleast have something to say, to occupy your time and energy in reading.  I will pull it out of me to share a poet’s glimpses of the world.

May peace surround you and contentment encompass you.

Ruminate on that!

To those of you with:

• Cognitive problems
• Psychosocial issues
• Behavioral incidents
• Neurological consequences
• Stress
• Uncontrollable urges
• Obsessive-compulsive ways
• Psychological battles
• Domineering egos
• Unlimited love to share
• Humor abounding
• Incessant smiles
• Calm dispositions
• Contagious good moods

Let us all come to interact in 2008 and share our strengths, learn from each other and may our self-instilled walls become penetrateable.  Healing is all around; we just need to allow it in.  Can we allow ourselves to slip out of habits of mind?  We don’t have to hold onto being “disabled”, but I think we do need to leave some things behind! Certainly before we can “step into the light”, we need to rid ourselves of how we pull the darkness in.

Lets approach 2008 with a fresh mindset and carry forward a new sense of hope and dreams (i.e. goals) into the new year!

Happy holidays and an exciting, happy and healthy New Year to all!

Celebration

It’s Mom’s birthday,
A day to rejoice in her arrival,
It’s a day for living to celebrate,
Also a day to give praise for my survival,

It’s been fifteen years,
It seems there’s no more gloom to clear,
No, not this year,
No urgency,
No tears,
Less need to reflect,
No hidden pains to dissect,

I’m building a new life,
Less dependency,
Less strife.
It gets cold
And alone,
In pulling away,
From habits I’ve known.

The day’s meaning I actually forgot,
Mom called and reminded me,
How she’s grateful,
That me she’s got,
And that I’m here,
To celebrate another year…

The toils & strife that I’ve endured,
I’ve earned the right to be heard..
I smile knowingly and sweetly,
Feeling ready to approach new frontiers,
Because I’ve survived
Eighteen years.

I know that holiday season approaching, the word celebration’s meaning just may be up for discussion! Loneliness at this time of year can be rough.

That said, I do want to announce Gray Matters Support Group is going to have a holiday celebration/ guest speaker on Friday night, December 14. We will be meeting at Ko Ko Beach Restaurant in Carlsbad, CA. Penelope Andrade will be speaking on using emotions as medicine. For more info on the meeting, e-mail me at heidi@graymatters4u.com.

The following is Penelope’s synopsis of her presentation.

Emotional Medicine: Key to Recovery

1 hour presentation for Brain Injury Support Group December 14, 2007

Recovering from physical, emotional or mental trauma requires emotion!

Sad, Mad, Scared, Glad emotions are medicine…when you know how to use them!

1–3 minutes of emotional flow is essential to: 1. help restore clarity to your brain; 2. shift your moods from bad to glad; 3. Strengthen your immune system, nervous system, glandular system and facilitate healing communication between body and mind.

Most of us do not know how to use the good medicine our emotions provide to heal ourselves and our lives. This presentation will focus on the simple steps anyone can take to unlock the door to their own inner pharmacy of emotional medicine:

* How to tell the difference between an emotion and a ‘story’ or dysfunctional thought.

* How to use body sensations to decipher your body’s messages about what emotional medicine is needed.

* How to move through numbness and come back to life.

* How three minutes of emotional flow makes the difference between gloom and glory.

* How to restore calmness and confidence in just 9 minutes no mater what is happening.

In this exciting, inspiring one hour presentation, participants will have an opportunity to release old belief systems about emotions being bad and toxic. They will learn how old thought patterns prevent them from enjoying the benefits of brief, embodied, emotional flow. Emotions will be revealed to be the elegant gifts of self regulation, self medication, and self realization that they were designed to be.

Penelope Young Andrade, LCSW is a licensed psychotherapist, founder of the San Diego Center for Bio-Psychosynthesis, News Columnist and web host of Transformational Talk Radio. She has had more than 35 years of experience integrating the best of traditional and alternative bodymind therapies for individuals, couples and families. Check out her website www.penelopetalk.com email penart@abac.com Or call 858-481.5752 for more information.

I would like others to know that the day of a traumatic, close to death experience is not something that can be wiped off of a person’s memory bank - ever! Does a person ever forget their birthday? …At this very time 18 years ago, I was captivated in a comatose state. My injury happened on my mom’s birthday and every year she reminds me of how she’s happy I’m still here. For me, this time brings me back to my very core, the life force that keeps us alive. Year by year, my memories get to be a bit less morose. This significant anniversary time that causes me to reassess and organize my priorities.

My “trauma” has been such a transition for me, that it’s still putting meaning in my life. Everyone has wishes and hopes for me, but what do I want? What’s going to make me happy? What’s going to keep me feeling I’m fulfilling a mission of purpose? What’s basically going to get me beyond the drudgeries and boring times in life? What’s going to keep me bouncing along with a smile? Aren’t these important considerations for all of us (even those of us who are just surviving everyday life with no traumatic memories)?